Kurzes Essay - bitte um Korrektur

  • Hi,
    my homework has been to write a short essay about "Is the American Dream a reason to emigrate to the United States of America".

    Obviously English is a kind of nightmare for me. I would be grateful for the correction of my essay and a comment about it.
    (Grade 11, Gymnasium)


    The United States of America is one of the biggest countries and a country of various cultures and mentalities as well, despite it is questioned by Europeans.

    In fact North America has many facets.
    On the one side are snow covered countrysides in the northern parts and on the other side is a tropical climate in the south.
    It is a country of diversities and multifarious religions, political and economic views and attitudes.

    Accordingly people, who proclaim the American Dream as a reason to emigrate to the United States, are undeniable visionaries.
    Summarized the term "American Dream" is defined as a cheerful and carefree life in a convivial environment with lots of money.

    The "Dream Factory" Hollywood is apparently announcing the message of a man, who can rise from the bottom of the society to the top, through their movies.
    The message which is neglected by the common world is mesmerizing the ones without future.
    The part of the community, which is, caused by a lack of education, unoccupied.
    Furthermore most of them are lonely and living modestly.

    They want their old life to remain and desire a beginnig, even if the foundation is just a movie.

    As mentioned North America is a country of diversities, but chiefly because of its demension and considerable rate of population.

    Obviously a country, even the United States of America, cannot provide a lighthearted life.