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Thema: Fehler

  1. #1
    collcat
    Gast

    Standard Fehler

    Ich hab diesen Text hier auf Englisch selbst geschrieben,ich hab ihn jetzt schon drei Mal durchgelesen und ich hab auch einpaar Fehler gefunden und korrigiert,aber kann vielleicht jemand den Text noch mal kurz durchlesen,weil ich glaube da sind noch Fehler drin die ich nicht so gut mit meine englisch Kenntnissen erkennen kann (Grammatik oder Satzstellung und so).Hier ist der Text:

    250 years ago a big immigration wave started from Europe to America. At that time poverty and oppression ruled in Europe, the people lived under the worst conditions. They had no money, no right on her own opinion and of course no political freedom. Many Europeans saw no more future prospects in their native country and, therefore,they decided to emigrate to America. Most Europeans left her native country for political and religious reasons. They could not realise her religion in her native country and they were also pursued, therefore. Also they often suffered from political persecution in her home country and emigrated in hope to find political freedom.But they also came for economic reasons and searched better living conditions, because they had no work in Europe and couldn’t make there a life for exist (konnten sich dort keine Existenz aufbauen). They hoped for all that in America which lured at that time the immigrants by great economic prospects and religious and political freedom.Therefore, immigrants flowed out of Europe in the United States, only from the fact that they hoped there for a better life than their present one. A new country was for them like a new chance, they saw in her the dream to develop themselves freely (sich frei zu entwickeln) and to practise their potential which was not offered in their fatherland.In view of the unlimited possibilities, hey undertook the trip to America which needs a lot of courage and flexibility to leave his home country and to start a new life in another country.Nevertheless, many of them have not even arrived there, but already died in the ships on the way there. But only the thought of a life in liberty, was for the Europeans reason enough at least to try it and, therefore, they also spent her last money on this trip which simply shows that hope led they (was einfach zeigt dass die Hoffnung sie leitete).Hope for a better life, somewhere behind the horizon.In a country which they didn’t know,without knowing what came up to them, always with the aim to be able to live a good life and to be able to develop freely. Today this is obvious, but at that time it was a luxury whose realisation was a dream.And to be able to fulfil him, they gave up a lot: Their home , their family, so to speak their whole former life.For it one needs like already said a lot of courage,above all if the way is so far and one doesn’t know what one expected. The desperation of the people must have been quite big if they undertook such something (wenn sie so etwas auf sich nahmen).They long so much for equality,freedom and simply a happier life,that they took all victims on their self to fulfilled her dream, which embodied,so to speak, the"American Dream" and therefore the USA. At least, all these facts were for the Europeans reasons why they decided to immigrate in the USA, because also at that time the USA they conceive with open arms,which changed, however, with the years. This is also the reason why in America nowadays so many races live, because America was the only country which gave the immigrants freedom and chances for success.
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  2. #2
    Neuer Benutzer Avatar von 666Mariko666
    Registriert seit
    14.12.2008
    Beiträge
    9

    Standard

    Es wird zwar ein bisschen spät kommen, aber ich hoffe, ich kann dir trotzdem helfen^^

    250 years ago a big immigration wave started from Europe to America. At that time poverty and oppression ruled in Europe and the people lived under the worst conditions. They had no money, no right on her of an own opinion and of course no political freedom. Many Europeans saw no more future prospects in their native country and, therefore,they decided to emigrate to America. Most Europeans left her their native country for political and religious reasons. They could not realise practice her their religion in her native country and therefore were also pursued, therefore. Also They also often suffered from political persecution in her their home country and emigrated in hope to find of finding political freedom.But they also came for economic reasons and searched for better living conditions, because they had no work in Europe and couldn’t make there a life for exist build up their own lives.

    Den nächsten Satz blicke ich nicht. Was meinst du damit???

    They hoped for all that in America which lured at that time the immigrants by great economic prospects and religious and political freedom.

    At that time, America attracted immigrants with great economic prostpects and religious and political freedom.
    So gibt der Satz wenigstens für mich einen Sinn^^


    Therefore, immigrants flowed out of Europe in the United States, only from for the fact that they hoped there for a better life than their present one. A new country was for them like a new chance, they saw in her it the dream to develop themselves freely and to practise their potential which was not offered in their fatherland.(kann man zwar sagen, härt sich aber einfach nur Denglisch an...) country of their ancestors. In view of the unlimited possibilities, they undertook the trip to America which needs needed a lot of courage and flexibility to leave his their home country and to start a new life in another country.Nevertheless, many of them have not even arrived didn't even arrive there, but and already died in on the ships on the way there. But only the thought of a life in liberty was were for the Europeans reason enough enough reason at least to try it and, therefore they also spent her their last money on this trip which simply shows that hope led they them .
    Hope for a better life somewhere behind beyond the horizon.
    In a country which they didn’t know,without knowing what came up what would happen to them, always with the aim to be able to live a good life and to be able to develop freely.
    Today this is obvious natural , but at that time it was a luxury whose realisation was a dream (das kann man einfach so nicht sagen und mir fällt gerade nichts ein, womit man es besser machen könnte...).
    And to be able to fulfill him it, they gave up a lot: Their home , their family, so to speak actually their whole former life. For it one needs like already said a lot of courage,above all if the way is so far and one doesn’t know what one expected. (Du wiederholst dich zu oft. Dieser Satz ist falsch und war unnötig noch dazu)

    The desperation of the people must have been quite really big if they undertook such something a thing .They longed so much for equality,freedom and simply a happier life that they took all victims on their self to fulfilled her their dream, which embodied,so to speak, the"American Dream" and therefore the USA. At least, all these facts were for the Europeans reasons why they decided to decide to immigrate in the USA, because also at that time the USA they conceived them with open arms,which changed, however, with in the years. This is also the reason why in America nowadays so many races live, because America was the only country which gave the immigrants freedom and chances and the hopfe for success.


    __________________________________________________ ____________

    Aua.
    Also, damit überhaupt noch jemand durchblickt, poste ich gleich danach nochmals eine Version ohne diese ganzen Fehler und Farben (also eine clear Version).
    Zur Legende:

    So markiert kann man sich wegedenken, nur das grüne soll gelesen werden.

    Also, ich muss sagen teilweise hast du schon richtig gute Ansätze. Du bemühst dich auch und möchtest schwere Sätze in einem gutem Englisch rüberbringen. Du hast einen großen Wortschat.
    Leider, wirklich leider, machst du noch so richtige Fehler, die doch schon im Anfangsstadium des Lernes der Sprache ausgemerzt sein sollen.

    Seit wann sind "Europeans" "her"? Erstens ist es Mehrzahl (was es "her" schon mal sofort ausschließt) und zweitens.... Du kannst doch nicht einfach so von Deutsch ins Englische übersetzen. Ich bin verzweifelt...

    Ein paar mal änderst du die Zeit... Ist aber nicht so schlimm. Passiert jedem mal.

    Du solltest dich aber echt nochmals dran setzen und von ganz von forne anfangen. Da sind echt ein paar grundlegende Dinge falsch, die einfach nicht sein dürfen. Such dir einen Nachhilfelehrer oder so, und mit dem lernst du dann freies Schreiben.
    Und ganz wichtig:

    ÜBEN ÜBEN ÜBEN ÜBEN ÜBEN!!!

    PS: Ich bin auch nicht perfekt. In dem ganzen Salat da oben sind sicher noch einige Fehler drin und bei mir wird sich auch noch so einiges eingeschlichen haben.

    Aber: Bitte nicht böse sein! Du hast schießlich um eine Korrektur geben und hier hast du sie bekommen

    EDIT:
    Beim nochmaligen Durchlesen sind mir noch viel mehr Fehler (auch mit meinen Markierungen) aufgefallen. Ich bin aber jetzt einfach zu faul. Bitte verzeih mir...
    Pure light is light without heat, a flame without smoke.

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